Loving my Job

I know that work is work and it isn't supposed to be fun. However does it need to suck so badly? Why can't I find a job that I care about or even think of a job that I wouldn't get sick of in a matter of months. I just don't want to get up in the morning. I want to sleep and sleep and sleep.
I know a lot of people agree with me on this.

I probably need to find a job that I care about where I am really doing something that I love. I just haven't figured that out yet.

Weddings

What is the deal with people getting married? I get the entire wanting to spend the rest of your life with someone, okay not really but I get the concept in principal. What I don't get is the need people have to confirm their choice in multiple parties and gifts.

There is an engagement party, bridal shower, bachelorette party, the wedding and not to mention the time commitment that all of those parties take up. And let's be honest unless you are my close family or friend I don't know how much time and or money I want to spend for these things.

In addition to this there is the entire fact that girls getting married want to surround themselves with friends. Friends that they might not have known before they were engaged. It's isn't that I don't want to be friends with people that are getting married I guess I just want to be less obvious that you kind of screwed yourself. You spent time getting to know this guy, and I get that you'll be married for a really long time you need to get to know them, but why should I now feel obligated to hang out with you?

I probably sound awful here. I know that but I am just wondering what these girls are thinking. We have only hung out in a group on occasion and now your bachelorette party will suck if I'm not there? Really? You didn't care about me that much before you wanted to make sure you didn't feel lame. And I go and bring a nice gift and make an effort because I don't think anyone should feel like a loser. I would want people there for me, so I get it I do. I just don't like all the fakeness of it all.

Here is the kicker though: For most of these people I will not be their friend after this. They will get married and live their married life and I will continue on in my single life, separately. It is like this long expensive, time consuming friendship that has an expiration date, the wedding date. Do we get to be friends again when I get married?

Am I the only one who notices this?

Side note: This is not always the case my close long term friends I expect to have a continued friendship with no matter their marital status.

One of the Grossest Things

I guess I just don't get it. A tandem bike, that you purchased. Didn't rent for a kick, but legitimately bought. And then you ride around town on it. I can honestly say that I will never be that person, that couple. On a tandem bike in spandex riding around town with my honey.
And if you are that type of person, type of couple let it be known that I will mock you.

At least their spandex didn't match.

I Compeletly Relate

When I get home from work I take my dog to the dog park. I change and we leave. He is used to this scenario so goes bananas when I get home; whining, jumping and the like. Today it is soaking rain (Fore those of you not familiar with Portland weather - that means that the rain drops are so fat I might was well shampoo out there since I will be soaking wet in seconds). Soaking rain means that I am not going to the dog park. mainly because I do not want to deal with a dog that wet.

If I do not immediately take him to the park, Ranger, nudges me whines and generally makes a nuisance of himself. Today though he gave up. He realized that he would not be getting what he wanted so now he is passed out. In so deep of a sleep his limbs are twitching.

That's how I feel lately if things don't go my way a nap seems like the best way to get over it.

Unfabulous Day

It should have been average. And it almost was. Today that is.
Here is where it went wrong:

1. The button popped on my pants (see post below)
2. Worked a temp job as a receptionist with nothing to do, literally nothing but answer the phone that maybe rang 10 times in 8 hours
3. Get in my car to head home and notice that I got a face mask in my hair so I have been walking around with white streaks in my hair
4. All day it felt like there was fuzz on my right upper eyelashes and no matter how hard I tried I couldn't fix it

That's what sidled my day from average to unfabulous. At least its Friday.

This could Become a Serious Issue

I have had this problem for a while now. Buttons pop off my pants. And before you finish your visualization of pants that are too tight, straining at the seems and a button hanging on for dear life before it careens across the room...this only occurs on my pants that aren't tight.

Take to day for instance; I am wearing one of my favorite professional pants - they fit me well, in fact I can fit 3 fingers in the waistband. I go to the restroom and as I go to unbutton my pants the button pops off and rolls across the bathroom floor. Luckily I have a belt on today and a longer shirt. Honestly I don't know what is going on.

Yesterday I had a similar problem. In this case though I was wearing pants I hadn't worn in a while so I had forgotten about the button until I was running late and had no time to change my outfit. And those pants are notoriously stretchy. By the end of the day I was pissed at myself for forgetting a belt.

I have had this problem consistently for the last several years and I just don't get it. And the pants I shouldn't be wearing the too tight one where I need an empire waist shirt to keep the muffin tops from being revealed in all their glory? Yeah those buttons are super glued on.

I wonder if I am just spending money on inferior pants.

It Makes Me Itch Just Thinking About It

I can keep silent no longer. Jump suits stress me out. All I can think about are the inherent problems with them. Think about going to the bathroom. Do you really want to get naked every time you have to pee? Isn't this the reason most of us wear bikini's or tankini's now?

In addition to the peeing problem they just don't look cute. If you saw the Vogue recently with Blake Lively on the cover and took a peek inside the entire issue was a bout jump suits. Yves Saint Laurent had a sequined one, it wasn't cute. Also Blake was featured in one and I am pretty sure she didn't want to be photographed in something that made her look like there was a stomach pouch where I am sure there isn't one.

Jumpsuits make me want to break into hives. It makes me nervous. And I have a confession I usually succumb to fashion. I hated leggings and now I wear them. I'm just saying I may be getting naked in the stall next to you soon and that makes me nervous. In fact it makes me nervous if you are getting naked in the stall next to me. So let's do the world a favor and keep our tops on when we pee. Say no to the jumpsuit!

Something Bigger

I write poetry. Sounds like a confession and it is. I don't know if it is good poetry or not. I just like doing it relaxes me, gives me some sort of outlet. And I have decided to share it. So remember I don't think I am some great poet and if you don't like poetry then skip this and we can pretend it never happened.

Something Bigger

She was supposed to do it all
Be it all
Live it, love it and leave it
Things were supposed to happen to her

Wasn't going to end like this
Be this small
Stuck in place
Trapped in a such a box
Magic never seemed to happen

Married the wrong guy, young
Not an unusual story
Didn't need to be so tragic
Didn't need to be a sad story

She was supposed to do it all
Be it all
Live it, love it and leave it
Things were supposed to happen for her

She was told she was magic
Words that played in her mind like a favorite movie
Magic means you're going to be something more
Means people will know who you are

Wasn't going to end like this
Be this small
Stuck in place
Trapped in such a box
Magic never seemed to happen

Now she only smiled in the mirror
Spreading her misery around
Thinking of how things could have been
Where she'd be, what she'd be
Instead of diapers
Instead of sleeping beside the same guy since high school
Instead of living with this constant dissatisfaction

Wasn't going to end like this
Be this small
Stuck in place
Trapped in such a box
Magic never seemed to happen

She was supposed to do it all
Be it all
Live it, love it and leave it
Things were supposed to happen for her

Moral Ambiguity

It isn’t something I have ever really thought about. I was reading a book and the main character applied to an ad that one of traits they were looking for was someone with moral flexibility. He decided it would be sexier if he was, flexible.

It did phrase these questions, in regards to one’s morality: Would you kill anyone? Steal from old people? And for me the answers are: that is situational, and not if I can help it.

The idea really made me think though. I have never thought if I am a morally flexible person. Thinking about it though I came to the same conclusion as the character – it is definitely sexier. When you think of someone isn’t morally flexible the first thing that pops into mind is a buzz kill. It isn’t someone you want to invite your awesome party- that morally rigid person. How boring do they sound? Lets invite the person who is more flexible I bet he is fun!

He might steal you TV too!

Buggy

Sometimes you're the windshield and sometimes you're the bug.
Today I am the bug.