Monday, October 12, 2009

How Does this Seem to be the Case?

Something got me riled this weekend. Instead of my usual response to ignore it and let it go I decided to address the problem. I wrote what I felt to be very clear e-mails to the parties involved. They may have made me look crazy (I stand by the fact that they did in fact not). Maybe the hurt was still a little to raw and they came across as more than I wanted it to.

Anyway to make the point I have already gotten a response from one of the e-mails. In my response I think I apologized!! Why cannot I not shake this need to be a good girl and appease people, make them happy? I still think I have a right to be annoyed but now I feel bad about how I expressed myself. Why?

How did this get so turned around? I'm still mad but now I think I could have handled the situation better or stated myself more clearly. Even worse now I am wondering if I viewed the entire situation wrong.

Why do I always end up conceding like this? Why can't I ever hold onto my "righteous" anger? Probably for the best that I am able to move on and forgive so easily. Right?

I guess the point is that I apologize for getting mad.

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